Ever reached a point when you realized that the people who are supposed to be there in your life 10 years later are not there even 10 days after they’ve skipped town…suddenly it all seems like a big 5 year long “april fools” joke. Suddenly you realize what a big fool you have been to think you were important.
How could I be important.Just because I feel I should be doesn’t mean I am right? ? New discovery on the never ending quest to understand people : A relationship doesn’t just depend on how you ‘feel’ . It depends on how you act.
Apparently what you feel is of no consideration unless you have the capability of translating it into actions. What did I expect? For 4 yrs I never tried. What did I think? One conversation would suddenly allow me into the inner circle? One year of trying every weekend doesn’t make up for 4 yrs of never being there. I don’t know him. He doesn’t know me. So why do I feel like I hold some importance. What do I have to offer right? There are 300 other ppl before me that have been his real frnds for the past 5 yrs…6 yrs now…so there are 300 other ppl he has to keep in touch with. Like he’s really going to have the time for me.
And the rest of them.............Did I ever share myself with them .Iv been through this with them before. Why does it bother me if they forget me every time they go out? I never talk to them they don’t know much about me or how I feel or what kind of person I am. They know me as the uber confident non caring non involved old nose poking lady. So what have I done in 4 yrs to change that image? i still don’t try. So screw me right.
Ill never learn. Im not a friend . Warning to all those who think im a friend: Im not.
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